N~n{)#82P vr? E aXbvq) t(>Iq!*vnvMQJ (W9 ))iZr=}i5 VԘ3/ ]c]`I2MsB @8# f>0gygv#U\zs 2`<6=V<·KW{"9dc!2`zի"P$+FOf=&уM]3F އרffqڷ/?Ӌ]e!κF#zbQAOVHG+ `O'PnwE GG!@Q 1@O(:S@-tʖQL{ъQNaF(n1ǀy4Ê'ep(ܭqSE&H4px>?+P11 T_++mJq)eJ$ œWݑʏʚb101`cU8oSQA$v¤:<u€Ry䊶jLD{R'j= $q[V7_c̷I()G˻ćf~X׀*P(U`KE٥\:M^UIV`*e,3ۥM5-Σ$-o9j+U{w8$|ݪY\.Q D}n e@O׿EYJJ@9`:1v5RCoҩ2c=iQ0G4:K9Zw|PHQ@ 4@ ֎٠4QPF8!~:1å- (T/ydaV[ ɧJ_95)!eSے qR! ✁PoҐ..XG5kB U՚8[j)5pvd"T7?/І Qu4"ӽQܤLW qIn] l ب,籙bK !"5R.\χJeK<+P;`s؜I?Rh4-j 2-dC)t 7iBz'?zh4FF18J֝5&w< <*d8B].Җњ*!L;xg)u 'j_0 9IH:^™Eip(K@E-GA@P) QHtv`:X{gjd\73$TGӊF2Wj@èSt6wN$2sTB}izP1c-(r(/> RE^vhbba1J) J=E/ҀE9cIV|=zFg#˖* 8Dj5 7K#gs}$DO ԭt,3RM8?ܐ{r".k`ROc(g(O^h KM!)Ǯ)0-l  U$خJTeYy mIr)u#؟uʝ|q>FݢHΈ w WCeA{d fŸԵb"_1Xqn@ # sa<(cخFH?Jnllkx"G(76kc7 >m]1Z9MƙXx">,-sMkKbSfrt<*3ҀE0á4A8İSD~cg֑qE);U.`'̅}8M2}(,^ih`R9BA" Q@ ;P)OZ>}hQ ǵ-@/K@¢( o Pϭ*}5,W|.wt’s*@6Z&'<ƢZK$P#mZ:A3Q4=N*l{n R6>eSJq0fV#Wl`R?]=i(yQۭD9@ /[<“3`w+7CNMqړNY2>['*:)Z0$MYAF QVo7H3܁߹t97.(Hgs뚐[ ‹It횤&"qDFA)1\HޤL3ipqEcA(Q4!;@>H,Nå[CT0946H{T-Jʹqco[5A)2;PH} R &i (?Z`'?z '!&ڏƁ:RHZJOJ(Ru1 )8b)Q@ihF%BҲ&R#4VlU$ȭSOR"ޫM#$ʈ"SL5'Fsڀ$';y}(Y^ 9^O823'& n4CN9bZDl+jێE;SL J({椆*䜚$fmzѺcecO9DXEiZGc - %-%!iPGj(JR{ 2ڀ.4^أ E0QRR-gYzxaPʎSJpx6¤!#f>x91v߫) vFH'4mbqm$: %*^ޕ[1Fށz1<>b)vQLL`>aۜvx'zwAH9j˵#(O+M,N@&PF{P&E86~e35h0&izE0!J@qIH`4Q@”u)(E(4Q/0w{ EʔP1yh@3u╎4ɟZދdh3Uϙ1Rv62sPiRdF3҈$la}il9bD*8bhbʠT%H@pR! 3қq;H1 RԈ0`(URwsCؐso| RcpgN Z9N;T1Q 4&;G&5,WEi@0OzbS(y Eb(v%-'!@ ‚EgiGҀ֊(Z=hҊ@ցKLbRz@f/,!޵&rEB.+遌TL+TY<P'1Jgv۰Ve*;OQa؉M U$|PAjA8ӵ4zP1,*҂3>,F{Tn=5"@)(Gg5uCVu4)4yNmd13iGJ b)Gj@zRJ;()>I@ J(: ihwK@ E(RH({vKHAڌR(MP~܂F*Vg*Њppj+~P!,G>e8fMy+r<4uQB@rGCO}!5f%FIx'I)8 `T=Ei)}P73hݕO3.EjT8ǎ\Qۊ:@h=((S&{!FxޛڀRb _A"E Joke Email - April 12th!! Just the Humor!!

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Keeping you amused every Monday morning!!
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Vol. 4, No. 5 April 12th, 1999
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By Tom Evans
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============
CONTENTS
============

  • The Starter
  • General Jokes
  • Animal Jokes
  • Sexist Jokes
  • You Know You're Jokes
  • How to Advice Jokes
  • Stupid Quote Jokes
  • Childrens Jokes
  • Yo Mama Jokes
  • Tasteless Jokes

------------------------------------------------------------------------

*=- The STARTER:
#################

** Hi everyone! Just a few short weeks until the premiere of Star Wars: 1st part of 1st Trilogy (can't remember the name..) so get queueing for those first seats. Also, we're now 1/4 of the way through 1999... better get the plans for the millenium sorted soon!

Good week...

:-)

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*=- General Jokes:
######################

** An 80-year-old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them.
When they arrived at the doctor's, they explained to the doctor about the problems they were having with their memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor told them that they were physically okay but might want to start writing things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left.
Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asked, "Where are you going?"
He replied, "To the kitchen."
She asked, "Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"
He replied, "Sure."
She then asked him, "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?"
He said, "No, I can remember that."
She then said, "Well, I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down 'cause I know you'll forget that."
He said, "I can remember that! You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."
She replied, "Well, I'd also like whipped cream on top. I know you'll forget that so you'd better write it down."
With irritation in his voice, he said, "I don't need to write that down! I can remember that." He then went fuming into the kitchen.
After about 20 minutes he returned from the kitchen and handed her a plate of bacon and eggs.
She stared at the plate for a moment and said, "You forgot my toast."



~~~~~~~~~~~ I'm hungry! Is there anything to eat? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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** Top 50 Oxymorons:

50. Act naturally
49. Found missing
48. Resident alien
47. Advanced BASIC
46. Genuine imitation
45. Airline Food
44. Good grief
43. Same difference
42. Almost exactly
41. Government organization
40. Sanitary landfill
39. Alone together
38. Legally drunk
37. Silent scream
36. British fashion
35. Living dead
34. Small crowd
33. Business ethics
32. Soft rock
31. Butt Head
30. Military Intelligence
29. Software documentation
28. New York culture
27. New classic
26. Sweet sorrow
25. Childproof
24. "Now, then ..."
23. Synthetic natural gas
22. Christian Sci! entists
21. Passive aggression
20. Taped live
19. Clearly misunderstood
18. Peace force
17. Extinct life
16. Temporary tax increase
15. Computer jock
14. Plastic glasses
13. Terribly pleased
12. Computer security
11. Political science
10. Tight slacks
9. Definite maybe
8. Pretty ugly
7. Twelve-ounce pound cake
6. Diet ice cream
5. Rap music
4. Working vacation
3. Exact estimate
2. Religious tolerance

And the Number one top oxymoron
1. Microsoft Works
_____________
From Wildthing!
-----------------------

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